Feeling any sort of anxiety after divorce is completely natural. As we’ve discussed elsewhere, while divorce and separation are often challenging life events, they can also be an opportunity for change. A time to start anew and make plans for a new future, full of new possibilities.
But it would be unfair to expect people to do this without having to manage some level of anxiety after divorce first. It’s common for newly separated people to worry about any number of the following, including:
- having reduced or limited time with your children
- having more responsibility for your children resulting in practical changes such as work commitments
- worrying about how to deal with ongoing challenges – potentially solo
- worrying about the impacts of the separation on your children
- losing “your half of the friends” as a result of separation and the impact on your networks of support
- fearing a future of living alone
- fearing making the same mistakes in future relationships
- worrying about the emotional and financial costs of going through the legal system
Managing anxiety after divorce
No doubt the prospect of life after divorce brings with it many anxieties. At least in the beginning anyway. It does not have to be that way forever. There are plenty of tried and tested things you can do to be in the best position to ride the ups and downs.
Here are some starting points:
- Seek professional help. The anxiety you may feel is very real but there is no reason for anyone to do this alone. This is particularly important if your anxieties are affecting your ability to do everyday things. Check out this factsheet from Beyond Blue for some good insights into the common behaviours that result from divorce and separation, and hence, need professional support.
- Prioritise your health. It is easy for us to abandon our immediate wellbeing, especially if it does not solve the problem in front of us. This article from Healthline lays out some of the daily practices that contribute to our wellbeing and can hold us in good enough stead to deal with the stressors of divorce.
- Find and choose a family lawyer you feel comfortable with. We know firsthand how intimidating the prospect of a legal battle is. But a good family lawyer will take the time to learn about your situation and show you the many options available. Working with a family lawyer you feel comfortable with will go a long way towards alleviating your stress.